East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
