Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I don't deserve a penis
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
