Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize