awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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