I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
So much rum. So many feels.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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