okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize