doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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