Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
3pm strippers are depressing
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
