Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
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