can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Randomize
