I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
