my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
