i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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