i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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