oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Dick very happy bro
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
