Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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