Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
You can't just leave with hair like that
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
