I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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