Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
