I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Randomize
