he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
