Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize