so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Randomize
