i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
