we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
