so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
