i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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