So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize