I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
