i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
