Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Who died my cat blue again?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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