Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
