u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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