Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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