White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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