i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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