I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
