listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
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