I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
