His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
