And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
