But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
