take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
