why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
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