The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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