we're blogging at a bar
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize