Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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