I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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