Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
