I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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