It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
